Do you want to see Santa snort a rail of holiday blow? A young pervert, replete in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles pajamas, spying on his sister in the shower? Teens invading a department store for a sleepover and partial lingerie show? And Grizzly Adams smoking, smoking, smoking? Then come join Los Angeles film critics Sarah Fensom and Chris Shields for a screening of the 1989 xmas trash classic, Elves–a film that dares to ask the question, “what if elves were actually Nazis?”

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Elves is a Dan Haggerty star vehicle (TV’s Grizzly Adams), in which the burly, bearded actor plays a down-on-his-luck former department store Santa. After being denied the seasonal gig and getting evicted from his trailer, he decides to squat in a dusty backroom of the department store. In between thousands of cigarettes, he starts to hear noises on the sales floor above. But rather than Santa and his reindeer, it’s a pack of horny teenagers running amok. This group of teens also happened to summon an evil cabal of elves using a former Nazi general’s collection of occult books mere days earlier, and these killer creatures descend on the store, as well. Before he can stub out his Marlboro red, Haggerty must try to save the teens—and Christmas.

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Along with the film there will be movie themed treats, holiday horror trivia, and maybe even a visit from the big man himself! Remember, seasonal depression comes but once a year and Elves just might be the cure!

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Tis’ the season to be smoking!

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dir. Jeffrey Mandel, 1989
United States, digital projection
89 min

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7:30 DOORS
8:00 SCREENING